I love my friends

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Londyn said...
You are beautiful, and anyone who doesn't see that is clearly blind. Tiny fireworks typically lead to a letdown. And if there is a pill that will change you, I would be hard pressed not to destroy it. You are you and "you" is (are) wonderful. I am sorry things are looking so shitty right now. And I know (I know!) that it's not really any help, but there are people in this world who see your beauty and love you for you. And it is lousy when the people we want to see it don't, but then you have to ask yourself, "What's wrong with that person that he can't see it?" Maybe it's all a bunch of pheremones and chemical reactions and whatnot, but on that slim chance that we have souls and etc I earnestly think (despite all my whining) that it is better to wait for a soul connection based on honesty than to want to change yourself for someone else. If you need anything, you know where to find me.

Amesie said...
Steppi you are an amazing, beautiful, smart, wonderful woman and like Londyn said, anyone who can't see that they are clearly blind. Right now I have "I would rather have a bottle in front of me than have a frontal lobotomy" playing. :) You have the most eclectic and awesome music collection, a great sense of style and you are proud of who you are. No one can tell you what to wear or what to do, you are yourself and that is an amazing quality to have. Even if there was a a"pill" to change you wouldn't want to, you are you and that is it. You don't need to be anyone but that. I wish I could be out there with you right now so I could be with you, but soon with xmas coming. I hope things get better out there. I love you Steppi and you will always be an amazing, talented, hot woman that I will always hold a high respect for. *hugs*
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So the past few days have been rather hard. I've got some sort of cold I am trying to shake off and with only 3 weeks left in school, I've been stressing. Plus I am still having my migranes....I have one right now and it's killing me...I took meds and I hope they kick in soon.

I talked to my professors...I am going to hack it out in Structure and then get an incomplete for Physics. Everytime I try to talk to my professors about it I am calm until the words come out of my mouth and then I start crying...I hate it...I don't mean to cry and it's not that upsetting really. Maybe it is a bit of fear because I don't know what's wrong with me. Part of me hope they find something on Tuesday with the CT scan, part of me hopes they don't.

And the other reason this week has been hard is because the Ben thing just keeps playing out in my mind with what might happen. I am preparred for the worst and maybe...the worst is what should happen...but it is rather painful and I really don't need that right now. It's made my week rather depressing.

I am going to clean tonight...maybe get some stuff back in order with my life. I need to start holiday shopping soon. I am on duty again tonight and then on Friday. Tonight "Lost" is on and then Puffy AmiYumi Show starts on Friday....I'm excited to be able to watch some TV and chill.